The Throwing-Up Season

What a career Mario Lopez has had! From his early days playing that cute knucklehead A.C. Slater to his twinkle-toed moves on Dancing with the Ho's to every forgettable thing in between, now comes the pinnacle of his career! He will soon be hosting a pointless...er, I mean exciting show bound to delight one and all! Get ready for Shot Put with the Stars!

Here he is showing contestants Fred Willard and Will Ferrell how it's done. I hear that Shatner just signed on! Awesome!

Beach Boy Baby Snatcher

I must've missed the very special Hallmark Hall of Fame adaptation of this gripping YA novel, starring Brian Wilson (hey, he had bills to pay) and the irrepressibly zany Mayim Bialik as two crazy canoe instructors leading double lives as baby snatchers! Yup, must've missed that one. Check out the load in that little guy's pants! No, I meant Brian's. Yes, children, back in the early 80's grown men paraded around in  short-shorts without any hint of embarrassment.  

I think I will be sick now. 

That's what the kids call it

Did you know that slaying the dragon is a euphemism for choking the chicken, which is a euphemism for spanking the monkey, which is a euphemism for flailing the whale, which is a ...oh, you know! But alas, there are no dragons being slayed in this tableau. With his skimpy shorts and come hither pose, perhaps our young hero is waiting for his very own St. George to slay his dragon. No, not that George, this                                                                                one!

No animals were harmed in the making of this post, dragons or otherwise.

Who what?! Tell us already!

a) likes to smear white clown makeup all over your face and watch the boys in their teeny-tiny gym shorts run laps? 

b) likes to lean against the true-to-scale replica of Carey High School you constructed soley out of balsa wood and dippity-do?

c) had a run-in with the po-po after dropping mesc at that chick concert?

d) the one whose sister is dead.

Since this is a YA novel, I think you know the answer to that one.